Infatuation

Infatuation is a dangerous thing. Infatuation disguises itself as love.

The definition if infatuation is:

Infatuation

Verb (used with object), infatuated, infatuating.

  • To inspire or possess with a foolish or unreasoning passion, as of love.
  • To affect with folly; make foolish or fatuous.

In essence, infatuation is simply a selfish emotion that has the ability to disguise itself as truth. I’m sure many of you are familiar with the quote that goes something like,

“I’m in love with places I’ve never been and people I’ve never met.”

With a young adult culture being utterly obsessed with the wanderlust concept, this quote has become increasingly popular. 18-year-old girls around the world are getting it tattooed on their ribcages and I’m sure it’s probably hand-lettered on a thrifted globe, which happens to be sitting on your vintage desk in the corner of your rustic themed dorm room. Let’s be honest though, I’m all about rustic decorating; muted neutral tones and wood accents, LOVE IT!

But anyway…

We have all become enthralled with the idea that we love all of these things we’ve never experienced, I honestly think that most of the time its just us falling in love with the idea in our heads. In a simple explanation, we’ve become infatuated with our perfectly designed ideas.

There’s a song by one of my favorite artists, Tossing Copper aka Jake Scott, that explains it perfectly. The song is called The Mason, and it goes like this,

I’ve held on so long

To what I want

You to become

I see that you are not

Who I dreamed you to be

But that’s not your fault

See long ago I made up my mind

She would be the love of my life

But now I see Ignorance is bliss

I fell in love with an idea in my head

But that’s not who she is

See I will take a thought

And let it grow

Till underneath it’s weight I am caught

When all I saw was a glimpse

Of who you might be

And I laid down these bricks

Building walls so lovely and strong

There’s no way, no chance I am wrong

Our castle stands and I know where she’ll fit

She’ll be with me here in my arms, I’m crazy in love

With who I think she is

When I finally get to see you

I latch onto the hope I see in you

I won’t let go, I’ll say

“Look there’s a chance what I hoped for might actually be so!”

But I cannot justify this

Small suspicion that slowly is creeping in

That the castle walls are shaking

I fight the fact maybe I was mistaken

I hate when I knew

Nothing was real

In all that I had believed to be true

And the walls

Came crumbling down

And all I could think was ‘where is all that wasted time now?’

See long ago I made up my mind

She would be the love of my life            

Now I see I never really know you one bit

I fell in love with an idea in my head

But that’s not who she is

 I’ve bolded bits of the song to show what I’m talking about, we fall in love with our ideas instead of the truth, and since our ideas are so beautiful, when the truth shows up we almost feel confused, misled, or even guilty.

This is often a problem for me because I have a hard time grasping the way God speaks to me, even though I know when it’s him. It’s so silly but I get a feeling in my gut. Almost like that feeling you would get before falling off a cliff. Many times, I want to ignore this even if I’ve had the feeling for a while because I’ve become so infatuated with my conclusions that I don’t stop to actually listen to or even acknowledge the ultimate designer. Even as I write this I am extremely confused as to if I can actually hear the truth or if I am still wrapped up in my emotions.

Romans 8:16 (ESV)

“The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God,”

One thing I firmly believe even in all of my confusion and disdain is that God hears me, no matter what, even if I feel confused or deaf to his direction. The cool part about giving your life to God is you become his child, and in that his spirit dwells in you. When his spirit dwells in you, he guides your steps even if you mess up or take the wrong turn.

Romans 8:26 (ESV)

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groaning’s too deep for words.”

Psalm 32:8 (ESV)

“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.”

This is something extremely difficult for me to grasp, because I have this thing where I really don’t want to screw up, but I guess that’s another thing that’s totally cool about Jesus. He gives us grace even in the moments when we let our infatuation take over. At the end of the day, infatuation can totally screw you up, but grace leads you home and helps you do better in the future, because is it really even a failure if you learned what not to do?

Plus a very wise friend of mine said, “even if you mess up for 2 months do you think that will completely change the destiny that has been placed over your life? NO!” Infatuation can be disguised as love, but the true, untainted love of our Heavenly Father will always guide us if we continue to seek his heart.

Well, this was randomly written before church, so I hope you have an amazing week! You are all amazing and beautiful, and talented, and supercalifragileisticexpalidoshus!

XoXo,

Bridgy Colleen

Bridgette WatsonComment