Are you guys ready for some real talk? Well, even if you’re not – it’s coming.
This week, is a conference that the Bethel Music online worship school, “WorshipU,” hosts once a year. It’s called WorshipU On Campus; [super easy to remember] basically worship leaders of all kinds, from all over the world come to Redding, CA for 2 weeks to learn from the Bethel Music leaders. It’s really amazing and it takes a year to plan.
This is my first year working at it as it is my first year working for Bethel Music. [It’s still so crazy to say that] Well, at WorshipU, the Lord comes in like a wrecking ball and makes your heart His home, in the best way. Because there is so much amazing breakthrough happening, the atmosphere is very thick.
I’ve learned about myself, over the course of the last year that I am heavily affected by the atmosphere of an environment. Like my emotions feel what everyone else is feeling and it can be extremely draining. Ok, so now that I’ve said all of that, I wills ay that I have not yet mastered the art of letting go of the stress of my surrounding environment. [Work in progress, people]
With the swirl of emotions happening around me, I had a panic attack last night. It wasn’t a bad one or a very long one, thank God, but I still had one. I started hyperventilating and had to lay on the ground. I called my bestfriend to pray for me and because she’s amazing, she hooked a sister up with some prayer and peace.
One thing I’ve noticed in these times of emotional distress is, it’s much harder to move on then it would have been to not let myself get caught up in the first place. Empathy, it is not a bad thing, but letting it control you is bad. It’s like anything, you can let it destroy you or let it push you to be better.
I’m learning that emotions are beautiful but they are not defining. It is very important to acknowledge them, because they are very real, but then it is also to not let them determine how you end a situation. Initial reactions are not always best. Think about it like this, you are in a fight with your brother, ok? He comes up to you and says something super sassy. You can either punch him in the face or choose to walk away. [P.S walking away is the right option]
This is where the phrase “let go and let God” comes in. I think most of the time when I’m letting emotions of an environment effect me is because I feel out of control because I cannot fix it. There is nothing I can do, but I’m not supposed to fixe people, and honestly, I forget that.
When the question of control is on the table often times worry is born. We put the weight of fixing people on our shoulders that fear, worry, inadequacy, and failure start to take over. That is not a weight we were meant to carry. God did not create us to save the world, He simply wants us to show it His love.
The empathy felt is not bad, because it helps you understand the love needed, but there is a point when we need to step out of the way and let God do what He needs to.
I really like Philippians 4:6-7 because it addresses every part of this so perfectly:
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. “
There is is, in black and white. Don’t worry, pray about your issue. When you give it to God He’ll give you a crazy peace that makes no sense and that peace will help guard your heart from what ever worry was originally stressing you out.
That’s so good.
Here’s the thing, I can’t sit here and say I’ve mastered that, like literally at all, but being aware of it helps me know what to do in the face of trouble.
Tomorrow, when I go into WorshipU and all the beautiful breakthrough that is the emotion of the atmosphere seems to be heavy, I know what I’m going to do. Rest in the peace of God that surpasses anything I could imagine.
You are amazing, your emotions don’t need to define your reaction. Ask God for peace and He will hook you up. It’s almost the weekend, let’s go out there and conquer the world. [with love.]