This is an open letter, to all the people who love me and want me to fall in love.
Beautiful people, thank you so much for your concern with my romantic life, or lack there of, but I don't need you to set me up with any or every man that is breathing. I appreciate it, I do, but I don't want to settle for someone just because he would be a "good husband." I am tired of being told that because I am not attracted to specific qualities that, that is what my husband is going to be -- "everything i never wanted."
It's hard when I'm continually told it's "ok" to be single, and I need to appreciate this season, but I am constantly being looked down upon and condescended to because I am not in a relationship. Just because I am not married or dating does not mean I don't know anything about life, I mean sure, I don't know about being married in my own right, but I have had many life experiences and I can still offer valid points in conversation.
Contrary to popular belief, as a single woman I am not pining for a man. I hold myself to a higher standard -- I'm not just going to date anyone because he has limbs and teeth. It has taken me many years to come to the point where I am confident in who I am in my own right, and I love who I'm becoming.
In Ecclesiastics it says there's a time and season for everything, so that's what I hold on to. Don't get me wrong, I am so excited to find a relationship, one day, in the Lords timing, and sure there are days when all I want to do is be married, but this season is for learning and that's exactly what I plan to do. Sometimes I have days where I question how far I've come and who I am, if anyone will ever love me in a romantic way, blah, blah, blah, but let's be honest, thats just doubt and doubt is simply fear trying to control me.
To all the people in the same boat as me, being frustrated every way you turn, you are not alone. I totally get it. All I can say is, don't give up, don't lower your standards, don't let doubt, fear, and loneliness dictate your decisions. You are so valuable and one day, maybe today, tomorrow, in a year, even in 10 years -- someone will love you and it will be exactly in the right time.
Live today knowing that everything you're building is the foundation of your future, become the person you are looking for. Never stop praying for your spouse, even before you meet them. This is something I'm still learning and working through, but give the people who just want the best for you grace. They are simply trying to help even if it doesn't feel that way. They love you and they want you to experience they joy they feel. Be strong and independent, but know when it's time to depend.
You are amazing.